Tag: coffee break

The 5 Love Languages

image

Hey guys!

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of witnessing a really special exchange. Two of my closest friends happen to be a married couple, and the topic of love languages came up. They proceeded to have a really interesting dialogue going back and forth about their love languages, and more importantly how it plays a role in their relationship. As a single person, it was really fascinating, and one heck of a reminder of how incredibly important communication is. They’ve been together forever, and they still took the time to thoughtfully discuss their sentiments on expressing themselves through their love language and receiving it -even though they’ve known their love languages for quite some time.

Speaking of time, here’s the irony. I was sitting at home one night with one of my roommates and closest friends, and the topic of love languages came up. She didn’t know hers, so I suggested she take the quiz. To my surprise, her love language was words of affirmation. I couldn’t believe it. I had incorrectly assumed all this time that it would have been quality of time; which means I had haphazardly been neglecting a part of her makeup I didn’t even know to be sensitive to. Now get this, I was telling my parents the story and at that moment it occurred to me that I didn’t know theirs either! They both had the same as my roomate, words of affirmation. It was mind blowing.

See the thing about love languages is that whatever love language(s) we have, ties directly into what makes us feel most loved. I know that may sound redundant, but it really is that simple. So whether it’s a family member, co-worker, partner or friend I make it a priority to know their love language (*birthday sign, communication style, motivation style, DISC profile… hahaha jk but seriously) because not being in tune with someone can potentially create unnecessary challenges when we’re operating relationships without a true understanding of how to thoughtfully connect with the people around us.

Below you’ll find the link to The 5 Love Language Quiz. And just FYI, I’m a quality of time, acts of service hybrid. So if we’re kickin it, you better be ready to roll your sleeves up haha Hence Mia’s Closet, and my awesome friends and family who have so graciously supported the vision every step of the way.

image

Find out your love language and share this post with your friends and family. It’ll knock you off your feet to learn this about yourself and those around you. Enjoy!

Peace, Love & Sunshine ~Chels

http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/

Let’s connect!

Instagram & Twitter: @thecoffeybreak

About Me: I’m a writer, content creator, futurist and founder of the nonprofit, Mia’s Closet. I love God, and honestly believe that everybody’s just doing the best they can with what they’ve got. Trust the process. The best is yet to come!

Oh! And I have an online store! Haha check us out here: www. TheCoffeyShop.co

 

 

 

 

Coffey Break Chat || The thing about approaching 30… and settling…

Hey guys!
I’m pretty pumped. This is my first Coffey Break Chat of 2015! It’s funny. I was on the phone with a friend last week telling her about how Cooking with the Coffey’s (a cooking spot I do with my little sister for the site) is somewhat of a comic relief after a few years writing and vlogging about being in the storm and that this year, I just wanted to breathe and have fun with The Coffey Break…
The irony, is that I then proceeded to talk to her for about another hour pouring out my heart about everything from career goals to relationships, and realized that I actually have so much to share!
I guess I’m not really wired to suppress my emotions, much less conversations, especially when it comes to the topic of settling. I’m like noooo! Don’t do it! haha 
Join me as I share how I’ve managed to remain dedicated to the vision I have for my future, even when everything is going crazy and those standards seem like more of an ideal than something I could actually be believing for.
The pressure to settle for less than God’s best in regard to one thing or another comes in waves for everyone. My current fight is simple: Don’t let 30 bully me into making poor choices. *Repeat lol
Enjoy!
Peace, love & sunshine ~ Chels

Coffey Break Chat: 8 Ways To Set Boundaries

Hi guys!
Today’s video is all about boundaries…or the lack thereof haha Although I’m fully convinced of their importance, I still find myself struggling with the best methods to not only identify areas where I need them, but most importantly ways to commit to them once they’ve been identified.
I love the idea of having a support system and accountability partners, but I’m also convinced that people feed off the energy you put out. We might have the best intentions, but without an ongoing commitment, it’s difficult to honor those boundaries, and we definitely shouldn’t expect others to respect our boundaries more than we do.
Having said that, I figured it was definitely time to do a little research on the best place to start with setting boundaries, and here’s what I got!
Enjoy!

Recap:

1. Know What You Want

Make a list of what you want, but don’t have yet, in different areas of your life. Be sure to include work life, home life, relationships, health, finances, spiritual path and any other areas that are important to you.

2. Set standards

Make a list of what you will never tolerate again in your life, and pray what you want into your life. We aren’t in this alone. Be intentional about asking God to literally remove the taste for whatever damaging traits, relationships, habits, etc. that you find yourself dealing with, and that it would be so easy to identify that it literally repels you when you come face to face with it.

Have a escape strategy already put in place. We all know aggressive people, have been in sticky situations, the list goes on… The best defense is being prepared for when those situations arise. 

3. Don’t assume

Your true boundaries may not offend people. A lot of times perception beats reality in our minds. Don’t make things harder than they have to be by assuming. Communication is everything, and it’s really important to manage expectations. I’d rather have an honest moment than a resentful passive aggressive interaction any day.

4. Start small

Establishing boundaries doesn’t mean you have come out kicking the door down. Be okay with starting out with asserting yourself with scenarios that are less intimidating. This will be a great way to build the confidence, and it’s also a great way to see that it’s not the end of the world if you simply can’t do whatever.

5. Be short and confident in your “no.”

When you feel bad or uncertain about saying no, it makes the situation awkward for everyone. People respond to the vibes we send out. Be intentional about the tone you set. Assertiveness is also best in situations like this. If you’re still uncomfortable, the best time to give it a go isn’t in front of the person haha Role play it! Sit down with someone who loves you enough to take the time to do it right and practice until you get it. 

6. Don’t apologize.

This is my new mission: Stop apologizing! You haven’t done anything wrong, and it’s not a bad thing if you’re unavailable. If there’s an opportunity to say yes to another time, offer it and keep it moving.

7. Trust your body.

If something makes your heart start to race, head itch or turn your stomach into knots, you should probably say no to the request. If you feel light and free when considering it, then definitely say yes. Learn how to recognize your own internal signals and find a way to push past the pressure that others put on you.

8. Commit
Commit to your Standards
Commit to your Why

Remember at the end of the day, every time we say no to one thing, we’re saying yes to something else -regardless of whether or not it’s intentional. We’ve been called to live out beautiful purpose filled lives and boundaries help us honor that. 
Feel free to visit here and here for the inspiration behind my list.
Peace, Love & Sunshine ~Chelsea